Hello

I was going to write "Welcome" as the subject of my first post, but then if no-one reads this it seems to be a bit ridiculous for one to welcome one's self to one's own blog. Likewise, it may be just as odd to greet one's self. I'll just hope that someone reads it so that the welcoming "Hello" isn't just for me and we can put all this nonsense behind us.

My name is Elliya. I'm 25 from the UK. And I am pro-Ana. That will most likely be the predominant focus of this blog, so if that bothers you, please stop reading and find a different page right now. I have been Ana since I was nine years old. At the time, I thought I had made her up. I mean, who else would think about starving themselves? It was one of the happiest moments I can recall when I discovered I'm not alone.

This blog is to record the journey of my life...the true journey. Not that act that all my friends and family see all day, but the real, true me. I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of writing down endless notes, lists, eating plans, and goals over and over until I have them memorized, when no one is ever going to read them but me. I'm tired of feeling lonely, and knowing that there's no one I can tell these things to.

I used to have an Ana blog, but it was found out several times by people who, although I firmly believe they meant well, I also am positive that they had no idea what they were dealing with, and the utter loss and destruction they caused by threatening to tell people about Ana "for my own good" if I didn't shut down my site. I tried to get a new one, but to no avail. For several years I was silent, to avoid being found again...but I can't take it any longer. The community, friendship and love I found in a group of other pro-Ana girls was amazing and I want it back.

So here I am. What can I say about myself? I'm left handed for everything except writing. I would give anything to attend Hogwarts. I'm a huge sci-fi nerd, and I'm okay with that. I love glitter. I have a phobia of making telephone calls. I love philosophy and hope to be a professor of philosophy at Cambridge or Oxford someday. LOST, Scrubs and Doctor Who are the three greatest shows on TV. In that order. Top Gear is pretty amazing to, even though I think cars are bloody dull. I'm a figure skater and a ballet dancer. I love music. I sing, play the piano decently, and love playing the guitar even though I'm rubbish at it.I'm clinically depressed, but I'm afraid to change it because I'm worried that will make me a different person. The only time I can really be honest, even with myself, seems to be when I'm sitting here mindlessly typing away letting my thoughts just go.

As far as Ana goes...
Height: 5' 7"
HW: 167
CW: 150.8
UGW: 110

I will be updating this a lot in the near future, I hope, and I will get up my goals, but for now I'll just stick with the big picture.

I love receiving comments, and I promise if you comment, I will write back to you. :)

Elliya